Casa de la Souz

Valentine’s Day Note

thesouz77 — Sat, 14 Feb 2009 15:53:28 +0000

Happy Valentine’s Day to all of you out there. Remember that while love drives us crazy sometimes, it does so because of that awesome feeling it brings to love someone more than yourself. Remember that even if it doesn’t last, you’re a better person for opening your heart and having let it happen to you. And for that alone, its worth fighting for–especially today. So take some time today to spend some one-on-one time with that special person whether it be your bf, gf, family, or pet (no not in that way sicko!) Ok, enough with me sounding like a “Liftetime” commercial .

Craigslist redux

thesouz77 — Sun, 09 Nov 2008 21:16:41 +0000

To the older woman watching me buying condoms – m4w

I was the 20 something guy holding two bottles of chardonay in the condom section of the Dominick’s. You were the lovely lady in her 50′s peering over my shoulder as I made my selection. I was not aware of your presence until the audible gasp when I reached for a box of ribbed magnums. My date did not go exactly as planned; the wine went down ok but I forgot to use the magnums in the heat of the moment and I think I may have gotten the clap. Long story short I still have a dozen condoms left over if you are interested in going out sometime…

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/chi/889660321.html

How to break your face at the gym

thesouz77 — Sun, 09 Nov 2008 21:10:25 +0000

I saw a lady at my gym bite it pretty hard on a treadmill and get thrown against the wall. It was hilarious. However, whenever I see this video it reminds me of why I always run on a track. Gyms should require their members to wear helmets on these things….

The problem with McCain’s campaign

thesouz77 — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 23:57:52 +0000

McCain has clearly gone negative. 100% of his ads are now negative and designed to attack the character of Barack Obama. If these were legit, it would be fair game. However, the narrative the McCain campaign is painting, is one close to the playing the race card. But instead of saying, “Don’t trust him, he is black!”, McCain and his MENSA member/VPOTUS Palin are now saying “Don’t trust him, he is a terrorist!” I suppose given Palin’s proximity to Russia, she is a commy.

Is Sarah Palin really this stupid?

thesouz77 — Sun, 05 Oct 2008 20:52:06 +0000

Frankly, people who really are stupid should be offended by that statement because I remain convinced that Sarah Palin makes people with real mental disabilities look like rocket scientists. I don’t say that to be mean. I don’t say that to be condescending. I say it because other than simply reading off a teleprompter or notes, Governor Palin has no idea what she is talking about. In my 31 short years on this planet, I have never seen the bar set so low for a candidate for higher office. In an interview she agreed to have with CBS’s Katie Couric, Palin derided Joe Biden’s age while seeming to forget that John McCain is 2 years away from hitting the median life expentency for males in the USA. In addition to that, for all her conservative credentials, Palin’s only recollection of a Supreme Court Case during the same interview was Roe v. Wade, a decision that was handed down when Palin was 9 years old. Now its possible that Palin was attending Jesus Camp by then, but most other children were playing kickball. In what perhaps showed her complete level of stupidity, Palin couldn’t recite any of the partial birth abortion high court decisions such as Stenberg v. Carhart or Gonzales v. Carhart. My point is that while I normally dont consider SCOTUS decisions a make or break decision for most independent voters, conservatives voters should have been demonstrably upset over Palin’s lack of knowledge over one of the party’s major social causes.

I also had the pleasure of watching CNN’s coverage where they included live feeds from a focus group of undecided voters in Ohio. It was clear that based on the trends of men in particularly, that whenever
gosh darn’et Sarah spoke, they were clearly masturbating to her winking at them. It clearly resonated with men including me, who found myself handing the television $20 for a lap dance.
And while I no doubt give Palin points for being telegenic and folksy, she rambled through her answers and was unable to articulate her principal’s stances on major issues. In fact the only thing I kept hearing was about energy independence and the word maverick. Oddly enough, I think it would behoove most Americans to know that Governor Palin leads a welfare state that takes more money from the federal government than it pays in taxes. Last I checked, maverick fiscal conservatives and the welfare states they run shouldnt even be words uttered in the same sentence much less nominees for VPOTUS.

As far as her maverick status is concerned, its utter bullshit. Alaska has become as synonamous with political corruption as the state of Louisiana. As Governor, its becoming increasingly clear that Palin used her authority as Governor to seek retrobution on those that were critical of her, such as Alaska Public Safety Commissioner Walt Monegan. This is conduct hardly deserving of the title maverick, particularly when Palin has failed to cooperate with an investigation that was approved by a GOP-led legislature.

While I wanted Palin to do well, she has indeed become a laughing stock. In fact, all Palin has proven is that SNL requires no writers to parse her own words. Comedians just have to repeat her words verbatim and the stupidity shines through on its own. That is not comedy, that is sad.

Ms. Alaska runner-up for VP!

thesouz77 — Sat, 30 Aug 2008 17:26:18 +0000

I noticed that John McCain predictably pandered to the right and chose a crazy right-winger, no name Governor who is barely known outside of Alaska. And for all the right wing talking heads who exclaim “She is the nation’s most popular governor!”, clearly the achievements of someone as popular as Sarah Palin should be already known to Americans, but they are not. While Governor Palin indeed looks like Tina Fey and is incredibly telegenic, her executive experience consists of being governor of a state that boasts 1 Alaskan/square mile for just 18 months. It’s the equivalent of picking the Governor of American Samoa. All that aside, Palin finds herself mired in an ethics scandal of her own where the Republican controlled legislature has launched a formal investigation to see if she abused her power as governor to pressure local officials to fire her sister’s ex-husband, a state tropper. As of late, particularly with the indictments of Sen Ted Stevens and Congressman Don Young, Alaska can vaunt a record on ethics violations and bribery that is almost on par with Louisana. Palin clearly is no different it seems, which begs the question, why chose someone with such little experience embroiled in an ethics scandal? Clearly better choices existed such as Govs. Tom Ridge, Tommy Thompson, Mark Sanford, or Tim Pawlenty. If the best thing the GOP can muster up for the VP, is an Governor who is mired in an abuse of power scandal, and whose previous experience is coming in 2nd place in Ms Alaska beauty pagent, this God help us all.

People may be enamored with Sarah Palin beauty but she likely wasn’t his first, second, or third choice. Just more pandering like his Saddleback Church performance..and it was a performance. Transparently scripted and rehearsed. Obama made a choice to select someone to complement his weakness…that requires thought and intelligence. McCain pandered to the right and panicked with Palin because he is desparate, out of ideas, and doesn’t want to stand by his record. How can you claim McCain is qualified when he chose someone less experienced than Obama to be a gunshot or malignancy away from the Presidency? McCain’s own judgement is on the line and rightfully so.

Go long Johnny POW

thesouz77 — Sat, 23 Aug 2008 15:35:04 +0000

Today Barack Obama selected longtime Delaware Senator Joe Biden as his running mate. Biden offers his experiences as a 6th term US senator whose tenure as the Chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee has gained him respect from both sides of the isle. Obama’s pick no doubt puts some serious pressure on John “POW” McCain to go long and pick someone unconventional. And by unconventional I mean someone that can use another word other than POW and someone who isn’t worth hundreds of millions of dollars and claims they understand the middle class. Just in case, if you haven’t heard, John McCain was and apparently from the frequency of its mention, still is a POW. POW, POW POW!!! John McCain – POW!

Tim Deluxe: It Just Won’t Do

thesouz77 — Sun, 17 Aug 2008 23:16:21 +0000

McCain, the Messiah: Did I mention Vietnam?

thesouz77 — Sun, 17 Aug 2008 16:13:18 +0000

Seems like it was a steamy night of love with Pastor Rick on CNN yesterday. While the network pundits were so positive about John McCain I do think his performance, and yes it was a performance, was incredibly scripted and bullshit. I think it was obvious that John McCain was telling people what they wanted to hear rather than what he truly believes. I think it was apparent that John McCain feels his only qualification for POTUS is that he was in a rathole in Vietnam as a POW—almost no mention of his voting record as a US Senator since 1987. McCain seemed to connect with the audience indeed but pandering is not even the best way to describe it. I equated his performance to a desparate hooker willing to perform any sexual deed to get those evangelical voters off. And get them off he did. It was masturbatory evangelical rhetoric at its best that even Rush Limbaugh, a frequent critic of McCain and horrible spouse himself, would be proud of.

And while I admire McCain’s great service, he still has a lot to answer for. When asked what his biggest sin was, the entire room went silent hoping for him to explain why he cheated on his crippled wife for a millionaress. But no explaination ensued other than to describe that he had a failed marriage. My favorite was CNN’s Dana Bash afterwards trying to qualify his lack of forecoming on the issue by saying “It was a different time back then and this is a 70 yr old man.” Bitch please. He cheated on a crippled wife and married up….that in most people’s book makes Paris Hilton’s escapades look like Patty Cake. Talk about low and shameful. Pastor Rick should have asked him, if you can’t handle a marriage with a crippled wife what makes you qualified to take on Al Qaeda? His marriage is cut and run, retreat, and defeat at its best.

Another wonderfully obvious pandering moment came when McCain was asked to name which Supreme Court justices he would not have voted for. While Barack answered succinctly and explained his reasoning for chosing Clarence Thomas (who literally falls asleep during oral arguments) McCain had to top it like a big cock contest. Oh, he didn’t just name one judge - he named every liberal judge (Ginsburg, Breyer, and Souter) on the bench, completely forgetting to let the crowd know that he voted to confirm all three. Must have been all that evangelical amnesia? Of course his answer left Tony Perkins and the Christian Broadcasting Network anchor with erections, moaning in ecstasy live on cable news who later had to excuse themselves and change their pants. But the truth remains it only exposed McCain’s hypocrisy of saying anything to get elected.

And of course, when it came to to TAXES….its was pretty clear. He was asked a very simple question about giving a number that qualifies someone as rich. McCain who turned into a pastor over the course of the interview proceeded to say he knows that “some of the most wealthy people are the most unhappy.” Of course, McCain and his wife worth tens of millions of dollars, dappered out in his $500 loafers like a robot kept repeating ” NO new taxes, no new taxes, no new taxes, my friends, VIETNAM, VIETNAM, VIETNAM!” When finally pushed, McCain said a modest 5 million bucks is what makes you rich. Talk about someone who has lost touch with reality.

A note to McCain’s campaign staff. Tell Vietnam John to stop saying:

“My friends” which was almost always followed with an obvious lie or bullshit story.

“Vietnam and POW” which seems to connote that he is crazy and can’t talk about his 31 yr Senate record.

And finally, next time Pastor McCain reaches enlightenment, a couple people falling into curtains and some live snakes slithering around would help for visuals.

What separates dogs from humans

thesouz77 — Sat, 16 Aug 2008 21:12:46 +0000

I am not going to throw stones because my dog has its moments. When some dogs get excited, they piss themselves, some bark, and some do the spazola like this: